The tears were unexpected. This morning I made my daughter’s last lunch of her first grade school year. As I zipped up her lunch box, in a whisper, I told my husband that on her next birthday she will be eight and later this year she will enter second grade. Everyday I realize how much she is turning into her own person. Her questions center on ideas outside herself. A few days ago she asked about Betsy Ross and the [...]
Children
An ordinary afternoon. Cloudless, the sun rays hit the window of my car. Climbing temperatures in the desert mean that spring is ending and that one hundred plus degree days are preparing for arrival. I picked up my little girl from school and headed to the grocery store to buy a few items for dinner. As I slammed my car door shut, I extended my arm and grabbed my daughter’s hand. We walked toward the grocery story and she spotted [...]
In the last few days, the images of the Boston tragedy keep flipping on and off in my mind. I learned today that the victims that passed were young: an eight year old boy, a twenty-nine year old young woman, and a twenty-three year old Boston University graduate student. So young. With their entire lives ahead of them. Each one was waiting for a loved one to cross the finish line. The news of amputated limbs, blood splattered on the streets, [...]
Last week my daughter and I spent Spring Break together. We hung out at home and in around places that were nearby. Before her break started, she devised a list of activities she wanted to do during the week. On Sunday night, the day before her break officially commenced, we watched a movie at home. We slid Judy Moody and the Bummer Summer into the DVD player. She grabbed popcorn from the bowl, popping each piece in her mouth, while [...]
The ordinary offers the best lessons. On Sunday, we ventured to a local Mediterranean place to eat lunch. After a twenty-minute wait, we crowded into a booth in the back of the restaurant. Our daughter grabbed the menu, corralled the crayons, and began to color the drawing on the back. A few minutes later, after she grew bored, we played a game of tic-tac-toe. In the background, waitresses balanced dishes on the palms of their hands, delivered lemonade, soda, and [...]
Beware the barrenness of a busy life. ~Socrates How many times do we utter the word, busy? By injecting into almost every conversation, does “busy” really mean anything? Do our ironclad vows to busy prevent us from cultivating simplicity? In the last month, these questions keep popping up especially on days that are particularly overwhelming. For years, I associated busy as a direct correlation to success. When I worked as an attorney, I sprinted through my days. Early morning preparation [...]
I am not a rollercoaster girl. In high school, I dreaded the summertime visit to Six Flags, the local amusement park that housed these gargantuan structures with its rolling cars, wooden frames, and unpredictable creaks. I played my fear cool as my friends and I walked the stairs to the latest gravity defying, nausea inducing ride. Others looked forward to the wind blowing through their hair while they extended their hands to the sky, reaching for that invisible something that [...]
This past month, on separate occasions, I heard two identical conversations regarding motherhood. Because I intersected with the same conversation twice, it forced me to take pause. The essence centered around this point: Mothering my daughter is just a fraction of my life. Right now, at this very moment, I sometimes lose sight of this truth. Some days motherhood is so consuming. From the moment I wake up, coaching of my daughter commences. “Wake up, honey. It is time to go [...]
My daughter squeezed my hand tight. Did she know something that I didn’t feel yet? Although our fingers are interlaced and clasped together, my eyes are not fixated on her, but I am unable to remember, months later, what has captured my attention. Sometimes we learn in retrospect. This flicker of time happened on June 24, 2012, on the morning of my sister’s wedding. Studying the picture now I realize that my little girl’s eyes dart upward. Her gaze [...]
“Do you know what I want for my birthday, Momma?” She moves around the living room on her mobile scooter, giggling as she poses her question. She scoots behind me and I smell time passing. She can no longer be cuddled in my arms. For the last few months, I’ve struggled to lift her into my grip. Yet another sign that letting go is always in the horizon. My thoughts are interrupted with her giddy voice, “Momma, are you going [...]
