Where I come from originates from my mother, sister, and daughter. My mom is unassuming and quiet. When she laughs, it is memorable. She always encourages me to look for the best in others, especially when I find it difficult. She’s taught me the importance of adjusting to less and the power a homemade meal can carry. With my sister, there is an ease that feels natural. She knows and gets me. I’ve learned through her to laugh a little [...]
Mothers/Daughters
Last week my daughter and I spent Spring Break together. We hung out at home and in around places that were nearby. Before her break started, she devised a list of activities she wanted to do during the week. On Sunday night, the day before her break officially commenced, we watched a movie at home. We slid Judy Moody and the Bummer Summer into the DVD player. She grabbed popcorn from the bowl, popping each piece in her mouth, while [...]
Today is my mother’s birthday. Although she will never admit it, I know she loves celebrating this day. She enjoys receiving greeting cards, early morning birthday wishes, and eating a sliver of something sweet. Commemorating birthdays were a tradition in our household. Celebrations centered on the simple: hugs, grocery store-bought cake, and dinner at the birthday person’s restaurant of choice. My father, in a teenage boy kind of way, teased my mom about getting older, but cushioned that remark [...]
My daughter squeezed my hand tight. Did she know something that I didn’t feel yet? Although our fingers are interlaced and clasped together, my eyes are not fixated on her, but I am unable to remember, months later, what has captured my attention. Sometimes we learn in retrospect. This flicker of time happened on June 24, 2012, on the morning of my sister’s wedding. Studying the picture now I realize that my little girl’s eyes dart upward. Her gaze [...]
“Do you know what I want for my birthday, Momma?” She moves around the living room on her mobile scooter, giggling as she poses her question. She scoots behind me and I smell time passing. She can no longer be cuddled in my arms. For the last few months, I’ve struggled to lift her into my grip. Yet another sign that letting go is always in the horizon. My thoughts are interrupted with her giddy voice, “Momma, are you going [...]
She ambles around the dining table and wants to set an extra plate at the dinner table. The dish clanks against the wood as the emptiness reverberates in the air. She’s made all of his favorites: Indian dal, potato curry, and rice pudding. The strong smell of curry sweep the room and her hand dances as she stirs the various textures in her favorite cooking pot. She clings to the past, but it offers her comfort. There is no denying [...]
Our daughter will turn seven in a few months. It hurts sometimes to say this aloud because I literally feel the passage of time piercing my insides. This week, I felt the sting of this even more because her first grade teacher asked if I would share a memory of her toddler years. I still remember all of the particulars of that day in the green grass. The blue sky loomed over us and felt like a part of us [...]
Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith. Henry Ward Beecher I’m home again. This visit is mixed with undertones of the familiar: giving my mom a tight squeeze bear hug, laughing and bickering with my sister, and embracing roads, both literal and figurative, that I’ve crossed many, many times before. During these conversations with my mom and sister, we talk about my father, Himat, and what [...]
Her tears spill out of her eyes. In my best mom voice, I say to my daughter, “It’s ok. Stop crying. IT will be ok. I promise.” My words don’t offer a salve, instead she gets more upset and responds with a one-liner that cuts the inside of my heart,”You hurt my feelings Momma.” “Oh. I am sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” I place my hand on her back, realizing that she is sensitive and that her [...]
I am surprised and humbled by mother’s strength. Late in life, she is beginning again. My mom, for the last four months, is living independently in her own apartment. And for those who don’t know her, this may not seem like an extraordinary feat. But it is. In so many ways. My mom married when she was 21 years old. After living with her parents all her life, she became a wife and mother. In doing so, she never had [...]
